Two Years Later: Why One Teen Is Grateful She Stayed
Every story of healing reminds us why access to trauma-informed care matters. With permission, we share the courageous words of a young woman who found hope, support, and a renewed love for life through therapy. When asked if she ever wanted to share this healing story with others and encourage them, the young woman who wrote this below, jumped at the chance!
These are her words:
"Hello! My name is "E." I’m 14, and this story started when I was early 12.
"In 2024, media sources had MANY, and I mean MANY misinformation people can recall, such as; “If you feel strange, that means your —” when usually it’s well, hormones. The internet had negative effects on me back then, and it made me into someone people wouldn’t recognize. I would be in discord, many addictive apps and sources that had 18+ content, and soon enough those sources rubbed off on me and influenced me in weird ways. I was disturbingly ill, and I wasn’t the happy girl my family knew anymore.
"I would stay home all day, I would participate in conversations that were sexual, my grades were F’s, I didn’t care to take enough care of myself, I barely showered, I barely took care of myself, I was mean, I was toxic to my friends, I was someone people would call “mentally ill”. That 12 year old girl was influenced by the media that injured her mentally, AND physically.
"People on the internet would influence terrible ideas to me, I would injure myself and send it to people on the internet, I would try getting attention from people even if it was negative or positive, I would watch 18+ content. Which started my addiction to it, I would watch stuff like that on the internet just as a guilty relief to my pain. I didn’t have restrictions on my devices so I went free with the internet. I had many toxic relationships that turned into stalkers who couldn’t get over me. I had people who were older than me take advantage of my mind and twisted it to try making me run away from my own home, my own parents, to try turning the table on my parents and family members. I questioned my own existence and who I was, I looked into the fake information on media sources and wondered if I was those things even if they were just my hormones, I believed I was someone else, I believed that other people didn’t care or love me enough to appreciate who I really was. I changed myself and I tried grabbing attention from people from fake suicide attempts. I would self harm on my wrists and I would bed rot everyday and night, I would even stay up every night thinking if I should exist or not. During that, I was even bullied for being too weird. I was disliked in my school and people caught up to my self harm and bullied me for that as well.
"I started taking therapy after my internet privileges were taken from me, I first didn’t want to, I was scared to, I didn’t have energy to do anything. But my first lesson came along, and for it being my first, it was soothing and relaxing. My therapy took place in a barn with animals such as horses, chicken, and pigs. My therapist and I would go to certain places in the barn and I would talk about my life and why I was subjected to therapy, I would show her my art and my characters I made. And in the first time, I felt understood, I felt relaxed talking about my feelings, I would feel happy when I finished therapy. I was able to interact with animals that I never expected myself to find, as I was taking therapy, I started to improve in mental health, especially the isolation of the internet. And to think about it to this day, remembering 12 year old me was planning to end it all on their 13th birthday breaks my heart dearly. Thanks to my therapist, my best-friend, and my family, I didn’t finish my life off early, yet there’s so many people who still go through this, even people who are younger go through what 12 year old me went through, it even hurts how there’s so many children and teens out there who go through the same thing, and usually half of them take the path young me would’ve taken… That’s the problem with our generation and the internet today. There are so many people out there who suffer and are too afraid to speak up for themselves and take the last resort.
"I’m glad that I never decided to end it all because I would’ve missed so many things, I feel things young me would’ve never felt. There’s so many things that I’m happy about in life that young me would probably never expect to have, if it weren’t for my family, friends, and my therapist, my eyes would’ve been closed for 2 whole years. Two. Whole. Years.. My eyes would’ve been closed for two years by now if it weren’t for them. And I’m so, SO glad they came and saved me because life is precious. We can only live once, so try living up to your full potential. If I would’ve died 2 years ago, I would have never met my best friend, my boyfriend. I would have never felt all these GOOD things life can provide and offer. What I learned, I know life can be harsh, it’s hard, painful, emotional, but what’s life if it’s only the same everyday? Life always, ALWAYS, has its ups and downs, people go through depression, happiness, grief, anger, excitement in many, many ways and forms. Life will always improve if you just give yourself a chance to redeem yourself and try in life instead of waiting for it to change. If you make the difference and make a change, life will always give you an opportunity to be happy, always. That’s what I learned from, because of my therapist Kaleigh Rogers, who's practically a sister to me! She gave me a chance to fix myself and make a difference in my life.
"I’m glad to still be alive, because I wouldn’t have felt how it is to be happy to be alive, I wouldn’t have felt how it is to be recognized, to be loved, to be known as someone. I gave life a chance, and I’m proud I did. I’m proud of the person I am today, and how that 12 year old girl grew up to the girl people now know as "E." Taking therapy helps so much, it improved my life so much, it helped me understand other people’s problems and it helped me improve myself in life and reflect myself two years ago, so I could see the difference and how much I grew as a person. If I wasn’t alive, I would have never seen the positive things in life people could accomplish, such as, I’m continuing my dream as an animator and a storyteller of my art pieces, and many of them have gone to art shows and won, young me would have never expected to achieve something like that. There’s always going to be good parts in life, you just have to work hard to achieve those memories, to achieve those goals, to achieve those dreams. I’ve always loved to draw ever since kindergarten, and it hurts to see how that 12 year old girl was going to throw those dreams away into the trash can. Therapy can help you with confidence, mental health, physical health, there are so many ways therapy can help you with, even if you just want to talk for one moment, if you want to be heard from your heart, if you want to be recognized as a human being, therapy would help you express who you truly want to be in life. Thank you to Kaleigh Rogers, I understand how it feels to live, to love, to understand, to have empathy. If you don’t know what to do in your life anymore, don’t give up, life has many possibilities that you can do, so never give up. Life is something precious, even if you fall, you always have a chance to stand back up to become stronger than ever, you just need to take that change and make a change in life.
"That’s what I learned in life, mistakes are normal, it’s another way to learn."
*Art created and life story written by "E."
I am so proud of this young woman. I am sure you can see why! Her wisdom is deep, her courage is high, and her life incredibly worth living. Share love to a teenager today.